and no, im not, nor was i ever, doing 'shrooms...hahaha

as you all should know by now, im pretty straight. i basically walk a straight line, not deviating too much from my own values and high standards and morals for myself. but tonight, as i overheard stories from a former teacher and thought of what ive witnessed, i felt like my path was a waste. i wondered why i didnt go crooked, why i didnt do what everyone else was doing around me. i could have enjoyed myself so much more. and i thought, even though i may have done what was "right", somewhere down the line, im gettin screwed over. won't i finish last as the nice girl? wont i get trampled on in this society because i believe that my own hard work and dedication should yield success? wont i get knocked down by all those who are running to get what they want, not caring how they do it?

::sigh::

let the rain fall down and wake my dreams