I have to figure out if UG is worth it. But how would I go about doing that? It's not that I don't feel anything for him. I don't know if I handle all the ups and downs that go with floating in between titles. I don't know how to let go of the need for a title...Damm. Dammit. I see...I think fatalb cursed me. I've so been on the opposite side of this before. Does that mean that this time I'm clingy? And can't let go? Dammit. Dammit. Dammit. I totally had a different point to make, but I've lost it... Must learn. Must learn. I'm afraid that if I don't cultivate feelings, they will go away, even if they were strong. How do you determine if it's worth it? I can't do it rationally. That doesn't matter to me in the end...I need to study...read for classes...Why...Stop worrying, I said...Thanks, Shawn, for sitting with me at dinner...See? It's not that hard to talk to eddiec...wonder if he likes Saves the Day...Raymond and I are for sure going...wonder if anyone else wants to go...House of Blues, Anaheim...November 4...730pm...I don't feel like doing anything...I think I need some pushing to start my homework...did I get any exercise...I'm scared of Dr. Professor...He seems scary...Why is Chappell so great...don't be revengeful pilin...and of course, I'm listening to sad music...looking for patches allllll day...

AGH! I'm sick of the monotony. I'm out.