i found a reason to show a side of me you didnt know

mood: tired, sore, and hopeful

so ever since a fieldtrip i took to the university of san diego, where i met with the executive director of the institute of peace and social justice, ive been trying to keep up with internation news. its been healthy and important, especially because i have never followed up on the news. and in comparison to kttv los angeles news, it is a sigh of relieft not to listen to hollywood accounts of gangs or police corruption. it is nice to read a critical account of what is happening in the world.

im taking this conflict resolution class. it reminds me when i was training to be a conflict manager in junior high school and how we watched "fern gully." but it means more than ever did before. especially now that i am older and can appreciate the skills that we are being taught, now that i can apply it to life.

there are 5 styles in which people deal with conflict: accomodate, avoid, compromise, force, and collaborate. i tend to be an avoider or accomodater. before this class, i used to think that avoiding was a way to help the relationship because i wasnt going to hurt the other person's feelings. however, now i understand that avoiding hurts a relationship. because when you avoid or do nothing, you are still affecting the other person in a silent way. and that silence, as stephanieb explains it, is hell. in order to keep a relationship growing and evolving, it has to be in motion. however, avoidance debilitates a relationship. :sigh: must let go of these dramatized versions of how to deal.

so i may need to take field notes on your conflicts. i promise your privacy will be protected, as any good ethnographer would do. its just to see how people deal with conflict.

and the reason is you