i decided i wanted to choose and commit to social work. and just do it. and i told bob that and he told me it would be hard because i give a lot of myself. i didn't really consider that, and if i would have, i wouldn't have seen it as a problem. but i guess it will be. and it'll probably lead to a lot of headaches and knots in my shoulders. and me learning where my boundaries are. but i think it'll be okay; it'll have to be. unless i decide to become a web developer or something. [shrugs]

i just watched "the nanny diaries" and it was a feel good movie. except how come in real life, the harvard hottie boys don't chase down the jersey girls? where are the good ones? jess, you have to get on the first phase of your wedding planning! ;) and while you're at it, can you download skype so we can talk without pesky limited phone minutes? :D

i wish i could say that i was over it. clean and free. but i'm not and probably won't ever be. but i will get better at living without it. i will get better at keeping it to myself if i remember it. i have to. practice makes permanent, right?

tomorrow i'll start at square one. see if i can whip out a sentence. in the meantime, i sleep so that my mind can play out everything i don't allow it to.