A Call for Help to myself

I have to make this work. I have to assert myself. I need to ask for what I need. And if I get it, I must continue to cultivate something of meaning. But if I don't get it, I must figure out what I should do.

The hardest lesson of the year 2002 was this: "love is not enough." I've realized that I've been placating problems, assuming that I could heal all wounds with my feelings. But it doesn't work that way.

As Lilly said, marriages are more than just love. Love cannot make a marriage work. There are so many factors that come into play. It would be idealistic and unrealistic to believe it possible. All marriages that have lasted have been more than just love, maybe even lacking love. Perhaps love's power is not in making someone stay close to you for "as long as you both shall live". Perhaps love's real power is keeping someone in your heart for the rest of your life. You can love someone with all you have, but that does not mean that they close. But love must work if after they leave, they are still in everything that is you. In that case, you have been truly touched by love. However, even if you have been touched by love, do not think that that means they should be with you. The universe works in strange ways. You just have to forge ahead through your life, filling it with value, remembering how blessed you have been to have even found love. Many people spend their lives searching for it but coming up empty handed. You are quite lucky.

I find before me life. I hope I am living.