Tuesday, March 28, 2006

i actually didn't want to post but there was too much mixed up in my mind.

today i had a day off from work and i thought it would be cool. but the rain didn't help. and i didn't help either. i was easily annoyed and put off by everything. and, i was tired. so i ran errands with the mom and returned just to sleep. and though the sleep was heavily needed, i woke up on the wrong side of the bed. i'm grouchy and i don't know why. maybe cuz i wanted to hear that theboy loved me but he didn't say it. maybe cuz my mom was mad at me last night for coming home late. and she was pouty and making a lot of noise. or maybe it's because she's going around saying she doesn't like anyone. or she was telling me what to do with my life; i don't like being told how to live my life. boo. so i was rude to her when she came in and told me she doesn't get me and why i told her i don't want to work. sure, there are days that i don't want to work but that doesn't mean i'm going to quit, which is what she thought. i'm sure part of me is being disobedient and ungrateful. but right now, i don't care.


Tuesday, March 21, 2006

thanks to everyone who remembered! thanks to those who sent warm wishes! thanks for thinking about me yesterday!

yay! golden ears!

yum, caaake!

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

i can't believe you had the nerve to say the things you said

escapades in uyen's journey
episode: resolution and lunch with darwin

today, i came to work resolute, determined to be strong and intrepid. i was not going to let my students knock me down today. so when patrick asked me if i wanted my rolling chair back, i said, "yes." armed with comfort and a pen, i set out to compose a letter informing students who misbehaved yesterday that they would not be allowed to sports tomorrow. i pounded that letter out and then went to pass it out. i hung around a bit just to make sure they didn't blow up. but nothing eventful happened.

program started at noon and students were meandering like usual. i tried to lure them in with card games. and they caught the bait. but they didn't stay long. by 1:40, all of my students were gone. however, the computer technician was still setting up our computer. with an early christmas present, one of the other day schools donated boardgames to us, including bulderdash and taboo. i brought taboo over and showed the technician how to play. darwin, that's his name, caught on quickly and seemed to enjoy the game. but then again, it was probably much better than just sitting and waiting for microsoft office to load. by the time we finished our game, it was 2:40 and neither one of us had had lunch. so i busted out my leftover pizza and shared with him, as we continued to converse about musical taste, future ambitions, anti-establisment, and what i wanted on my computer.

he left at 3:20 and i could have left too. but i wanted to play around on my newly set up computer. i printed away articles and ideas for program discussions and activities. i planned on leaving by 4 but one of allison's forms caught my formatting eye and i couldn't leave till 4:30.

spring approaches and i hope that my break brings about friends in vegas.

they hurt so bad that they ended our relationship

Sunday, March 12, 2006

when the smoke clears, what will be left for us but tears and pain?

so looking through the flickr explore shots, i remembered this random dream i had this morning, where i watched a giraffe break out of a shell to be born. i know that is not possible since giraffes are mammals and they aren't platypuses. but it just stood out.

i had this nice conversation with theboy where i told him what i needed/wanted for certain situations and he explained to me why he does some of the things that he does. i feel like we understand each other better. yeah!

thanks for the call, jes! i was so excited that i couldn't stop talking! tell ben i'm sorry. =)

why must we argue over the same things just to make up and go back again?

Saturday, March 11, 2006

it ain't easy being who we are

recent firsts:
  • purchase of my first veinti drink at starbucks
  • discipline talk with one of my students
  • drafting a letter of recommendation

    trying to stay warm. we're getting hit by a "late winter storm" with chillier temperatures than we've been accustomed to. glad i got that space heater. =)

    recently, i've wondered if i can really do non-profit. my skin is not thick enough and my heart is not protected enough. and what if the instability leaves me a broken mess? maybe i need something safer.

    we make something out of nothing

  • Monday, March 06, 2006

    well deserved.

    Saturday, March 04, 2006

    i keep my jealousy closed, closed

    how logical is love? do you have a choice? no choice? some choice?

    what is the diference between love between family members and love between non-family people? just because you have a choice to leave a friend or a significant other, do you if you love them?

    all this pondering about love is because of "in her shoes." and a bunch of friends. hehe... and those same friends may have inspired a rather trippy dream with too many guys in and out of my room, even my students!

    to fun and meaning! cheers!

    i'll be your best kept secret and your biggest mistake